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Thursday, November 3, 2005

LSD anyone?

Ever have one of those days when at every turn something is so absurd that you laugh cautiously while thinking "What the fuck was in my breakfast drink?" Today was one of those very days.

At lunch, I was on a walk around the city. I've not worked downtown in over 5 years, so it's high time to rediscover the city (high being the operative word). I decided to head to the Barnes and Noble to look for a book and what I saw gave me such a start that I had to collect myself.

I looked up to the wall above Weiner World (oh the irony) and saw Andy Warhol and Andy Carnegie having a girls' day out at the salon. What the fuck??? Don't believe me? See for yourself...



As if that weren't enough, after work, I'm walking to the car and there, walking in a group was this HUGE boy. I mean HUGE! He was probably 6'4" and easily 400lbs, dwarfing a group of late-teen girls. This alone wouldn't be that funny. The funny thing was, he was wearing this. Unfortunately, I can't help but think out-loud...so I spouted off: "No shit!"

I know, Bad Scottie!

Still, I'm not as evil as my office. I didn't really think about this before today... I was stepping off of the elevator in the lobby, I was already hungry, and then it got bad. In the lobby of my building are the entrances to both a Starbucks and a Quiznos.

The sweet smell of baked hoagies and roasting coffee hit my nose and I was immediately drooling. Did I stop and check these dens of hell? Nope, I was a good Scottie. I just grabbed my bag, put on my flippers, and swam my way out of the building in the river of drool that I created.

My office building is Hell. I'm convinced of it.

2 Comments:

At 11/03/2005 7:25 PM, Blogger 357martini's whiny, bitch-ass comment is...

Take the LSD and it'll all seem fine in the morn.........

 
At 11/03/2005 7:46 PM, Blogger honeykbee's whiny, bitch-ass comment is...

Could be worse, you could have a carvel in the lobby. Oh, the ice cream headache flashbacks!

 

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